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Wear your paranoia with pride

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Also in the Weekly World Inquisitor...

 

Unidentified spacecraft nearly hit Earth, says NASA

So-called 'artificial asteroid' could have caused a disaster

Vatican launches range of condoms - with holes

Pope-approved rubbers help sinners prevent disease and delay their journey to eternal damnation

Russian moon rover was stolen by aliens

Nuclear buggy turns up after being missing for 40 years

Christ killed in dinosaur attack

Jesus wasn't nailed to a cross, he was savaged by a T. Rex according to new evidence from the Holy Land

NASA sells Space Station to aliens !!

Cash-strapped space agency gets good price in timeshare deal

'Jesus rifles' now shooting Crusader bullets

US Army is using holy ammo in its fight to bring God to Afghanistan, says General

Apple launches iSlave mind-control device

Handheld gadget makes controlling slaves easy and hip

Boy scouts to become 'Obama Youth'

Youth organization reforms as armed militia in fight against terrorists, aliens and heathens

UK raises terror alert to 'bothersome'

British Government warns that 'something is up' but can't say what

Airport body scanners search for alien probes

New security scanners at airports are not checking for terrorists - they're looking for alien mind-control victims